Day 62: State of Catholicism

Posted: March 14, 2013 in Uncategorized

Yes, thank you all. It is true. I am now Pope Jorge, or you can call me Pope. As my first order of business, I would like to declare that all Catholics do the following:

1. Get rid of your dogs. They are disgusting.

2. Take cats into your homes and treat them as your superiors. Now, that I am Pope, this is now true.

3. I would like to take this time to recognize a new holiday. May 20th is now declared Macho Man Randy Savage Day for that is the day that he dropped the elbow on Jesus, and saved us from the rapture.

4. I also declare the month of August to now be called DemAugust and August 10th will now only be referred to Demond Day. All calendars are being recalled to reflect these changes. (You are welcome father)

Lastly, I would like to thank you all. It is an honor to be your Pope. Now, get back to work!

The Jorge has spoken.

Trust me on this gentlemen.

1. Greet your woman with a kiss when you first in the morning and when you get home.
2. Get some lotion. Any decent hand lotion will do.
3. Rub her feet for a couple of minutes. You only need a couple if this is a surprise.
4. Upon completion of rubbing said feet. Allow her to bask and, this is very important, don’t ask for anything.

Important: If you ignore instruction number 4, you will have wasted your time.

Side note to the ladies:
1. Don’t gripe if he doesn’t do it “right”.
2. Don’t whine if he doesn’t do it long enough.
3. Do thank him and be grateful (as long as he doesn’t ask for anything else).
4. Remember, that you don’t have the perfect man, but you have one that’s perfect for you. Even if he screws up, at least he’s trying.

Day 60: My First Shower

Posted: February 25, 2013 in Uncategorized

I probably should wait until I have some pictures, but I’ve never been the most patient for forget it. Yesterday, after my last appointment I go to wash my hands and I notice two odd things:

1. One of my co-workers, Jaye, was in the break room, and I hadn’t seen her all day. Translation: she didn’t work all day.

2. There was a table of food that wasn’t there when I left for my last appointment.

I find out about 10 minutes later that it was a surprise baby shower…for me.

Yep, I was confused too.

Jami evidently had been planning this for about a month, and executed the surprise to perfection. It was really cool. We did all the games and whatnot. Another co-worker is expecting 5 weeks after my wife, so it was a joint shower, but I was the only one who didn’t know.

I was touched.

It’s cool that someone would spend all that time and effort to plan something like that. Of course, as we all know, men usually don’t receive baby showers…or wedding showers for that matter. Yet, my co-workers thought enough of me to do so. It’s really neat and I’m honored.

Georgia made out like a bandit and there is more pink stuff in my house than I’d ever thought possible…and my wife’s baby shower is still a couple of weeks away.

I just wanted to publically say thank you to Jami and the rest of the Massage Envy J’town Crew.

Love you guys.

Day 59: Who is the Greatest?

Posted: February 21, 2013 in Uncategorized

Been a very interesting couple of days, so I’m a bit torn on what to write about. Soooo…

I posted on Facebook a couple of days ago asking the question, “Who is the bigger icon? Muhammad Ali or Michael Jordan.”

I was honestly surprised at the answer I received. Most people that I polled (granted, small sample) said Ali. Let’s look at it.

Michael Jordan:
Achievements
• Naismith Memorial Basketball Hall of Fame Class of 2009
• 6-time NBA Champion: 1991-93, 1996-98 (all with Chicago Bulls)
• 6-time NBA Finals Most Valuable Player: 1991-93, 1996-98
• Selected in 1996 as one of the “50 Greatest Players in NBA History”
• 2x Olympic gold medals: 1984, 1992
• NCAA National Championship – University of North Carolina: 1981-82
• Naismith College Player of the Year: 1984
• John R. Wooden Award: 1984
• Adolph Rupp Trophy: 1984

Heck of a list isn’t it?

Then add to it how he changed the way NBA basketball was played and refereed. The “hand check” rule allowed for more movement and spacing which helped guys drive to the basket a bit easier and made it a much faster game.

Then, there’s the Michael Jordan brand. There are still lines outside of shoe stores for the new pair of Jordans, and he hasn’t played basketball since 2003!!! Also, he really was the first athlete to “brand” himself as a business entity, and no other athlete has done it as well since.

He’s accomplished quite a bit, and he’s only 50.

Muhammad Ali
Accomplishments
Amateur Achievements
• Six-time Kentucky State Golden Gloves Champion
• 1959 Chicago Golden Gloves Tournament of Champions Light Heavyweight Champion 1959
• Intercity Golden Gloves Light Heavyweight Champion 1960
• Chicago Golden Gloves Tournament of Champions Heavyweight Champion
• 1960 Intercity Golden Gloves Heavyweight Champion
• 1959 and 1960 National AAU Light Heavyweight Champion
• 1960 Olympic Light Heavyweight Gold Medalist in Rome, Italy
Professional Achievements
• The first and only three-time lineal World Heavyweight Champion
• The first World Heavyweight Champion to come back from retirement and regain the title
• Won twenty-two World Heavyweight Championship fights and made 19 successful defenses
Awards and Recognition
• Named The Ring Fighter of the Year for 1963, 1972, 1974, 1975 and 1978
• Named Boxing Writers Association of America Fighter of the Year for 1965, 1974 and 1975
• Proclaimed “Fighter of the Decade” (1970s) by The Ring
• Named the greatest heavyweight of all-time by The Ring in 1998
• Named the greatest heavyweight of the 20th century by the Associated Press
• Named “Athlete of the Century” by GQ magazine
• Named “Sportsman of the 20th Century” by Sports Illustrated
• Inducted into the Florida Boxing Hall of Fame in 2010
Ali also changed the history of American sports by orchestrating the very first prize fight purse of $1,000,000. All his brash talking and insulting of Joe Frazier before their first fight had people who really wanted to see him win or who really wanted to see him lose, which he did.

What puts Ali over the top for me are all his humanitarian acts throughout his life. He gave up the sport he loved for what he believed in by refusing to be drafted for the Army, which was also a VERY unpopular decision.

It’s very close in some respects. However, here’s the final comparison.

Michael Jordan: Space Jam
Muhammad Ali: WrestleMania I

Ali by a landslide. ;-)

Day 58: Rays of Sunshine

Posted: February 19, 2013 in Uncategorized

I have been involved with the wrestling business for a little over a decade and I’ve seen all kinds of wild and interesting things.
• A humongous guy who is freaked about midgets
• A conversation with an Olympic champion.
• An interesting conversation with one of the all time greats.
• I’ve been mistaken for Rey Mysterio.
• I’ve been on Pay Per View
Also, I’ve met some really shady characters. I was never really sure about who was telling the truth and being real versus who was not.
Luckily, I really don’t care because I always told the truth (as I saw it right then), and let the chips fall where they may.
Even with all the shadiness I’ve witnessed, there is a ray of sunshine….actually there are two.

I still don't know who's who after 3 years!

I still don’t know who’s who after 3 years!

Ladies and gentlemen, The Blossom Twins.
I have never met two more pleasant people to be around. To quote a mutual friend, “If you don’t like The Blossoms, there’s something wrong with YOU.”
In the ring they can be a couple of terrors and we’ve had a war of words in front of the cameras. However, away from it, you won’t find better (or harder working) people to be around.
Their dedication to the perfecting their craft has resulted in them being on the first season of TNA Wrestling: British Boot Camp, so finally the world has been introduced to The Blossom Twins. Hopefully, this will lead to a long and illustrious career on the national stage.
Most importantly, today is their birthday.
I just wanted to show my appreciation to these wonderful ladies and publically wish them all the continued success they deserve.

Growing up, I was a pretty shy guy around women. I didn’t feel like I was good-looking and because of my lack of confidence, I was treated as such. It really stung when there’s a list going around the class voting on the hottest guy and no one checked my name.

(Do kids still pass notes in class?)

Of course, there were all the usually excuses I got to hear as well growing up. Of course, my favorite is:

“You’re such a good friend…(insert fiendish lie here)”

It was so bad, that I didn’t have my first date (or girlfriend) until I was a senior in high school!

What makes it worse is that it’s my sister’s birthday as well. Yes, I got to feel even more insignificant because that day was all about her when I got home, which seemed like every other day of the year…minus Demond Day.

Fast forward to today.

I am married to the love of my life.
I have a healthy child on the way, which is something I thought I’d never say.
And I am Acca-Awesome!

And I still hate Valentine’s Day.

I don’t need to buy overpriced flowers (they double in price this time of year) or candy to prove to my wife that I love her. I tell her every single day. I show her through how I conduct myself. I don’t need a holiday for any of that and neither do you.

Tell your loved ones you love them any chance you get.

Because you never know when it will be the last time.

Day 56: The Fist Philosophy

Posted: February 11, 2013 in Uncategorized

A Simple Cure for the Blues

This is a suggestion made by my buddy, Paul.  He told me this the other day, and I thought it was brilliant.  If you’re having a bad day, or having a moment, stop for a second.  Then open up your hand.  Then think about 5 things to be grateful for:

  1. Family:  It doesn’t matter if it’s your mother, father, spouse, kids, or siblings.  If you don’t like any of them, then go to extended family.  ;-)  After you spend time here, close your index finger.
  2. Friends:  This one is a bit fun because these are people you choose in your life.  Also, remind yourself of some good times you’ve had, and be grateful that you have them.  After you spend time here, close your middle finger.
  3. Job:  Most of us don’t like our work ALL the time, but we like it at least some of the time.  Also, if nothing else, your work provides you with an opportunity to earn an income to support your family and hang out with your friends.  After you spend time here, close your ring finger.
  4. Work:  Some people confuse their job with their work.  Your job is the “9-5″ that you earn your living.  Your work is what you were put on this planet to do that only you can do.  If your job and your work are the same, that’s awesome.  Sometimes it’s not.  I work as a massage therapist, but my work is helping people get better though better movement.  Two related things, but are actually different.  After you spend time here, close your pinkie.
  5. Life:  Be grateful that you’re alive.  Just by having the problem that you were dwelling on, you have a chance to experience it.  We truly get to experience life when we handle our problems head on because we get to learn from them.  After you spend time here, close your thumb around your fingers.

What are you left with?  A fist.  Your hand is strongest when clenched in a fist, and you are stronger because of the 5 things you’re grateful for.  I’m not sure what Paul called it, but I call it the Fist Philosophy.

Give it a shot and see what you think.